WWLD
We agreed not to ask Jesus anymore, the 2 Jesus I know of don’t speak English. The first one was the new help of the super at the building I used to live in and the other one is Jesus of Nazareth. English wasn’t even a language back then, so let’s get real.
Nobody would ask me for advice, but still I like to pour out my thoughts on my friends’ Facebook statuses. Why? Because I want.
I’m gonna share with you 2 images, which I’ll translate so you have an idea of what my friends are like.
WWLD Part 1
Viktor Status:
It’s lovely to start the day with your boss yelling and putting you in your place 
Perrito (Me): Marvelous!
Carlicos: then you stay put all morning, holding your sh*t and pee, wishing for a blackhole to open on your computer screen…Poor Vicky!
Viktor: hahahaha I would have rather got a slap, just that, I swear.
Viktor: A slap and a “You know what you’ve done!”
Carlicos: Vicky, quit the cleaning company you work for, you’re worth much more! You can get a churros trailer, or work for a moving company (you’ve got biceps), or even deliver pizza, but being humiliated, never!
Viktor: I think I’ll dye my hair blond.
WWLD Part 2
Me: If I were you, tomorrow I would go to the office dressed in my best attire, I would get there late and with my breakfast, I wouldn’t turn the computer on until I’m done with my breakfast. I’d light a cigarette in the office (even if I don’t smoke) and put it on the keyboard. Wait till the boss calls me, go to his office with my faux fur on and my sunglasses on my head. When I get in I’d ask him “You want me to close the door or you want everybody to hear?”
Me: He’d look puzzled.
I’d close the door and as soon as he starts talking I’d take my sunglasses off and tell him “Jose Julian! Enough, I’m fed up, you either give me the place I deserve or right now I’m going to your place and tell your wife that I’m the mother of her kids, after yesterday I’m determined to not put up with this kinda of treatment”
I’d put my sunglasses on and go back to my desk to extinguish the fire from my keyboard.
Me: Or you can do what Carlicos had been doing the last 2 years, eating from us taxpayers and travel the world (Carlicos is currently unemployed and received unemployment checks)
Viktor: Laughs hysterically.
Viktor: Or keep my mouth shut like a submissive Spanish employee that I am, after all my boss was partially right even tho the way he talked was not appropriate.
Carlicos: Perrito, you bitch!!
So, my friend just updated me, he got fined 100 Euros for jaywalking on his way home, what a lovely way to finish your day.
I’m sorry Vicky, 100 Euros less for your boob job.
ticket for jaywalking? Ouch what a horrible way to end your day indeed!
Talk about hunger, I heard of people getting tickets in cities like Wappinger Falls but in big cities that’s unheard of, however, with the crisis I think the police has to meet their quota regardless.
true but jaywalking? That would piss me off to no end!
They would have taken me in for felony, I would have beaten the life of the officer, rush hour in a big city, is Madrid we are talking about in here. Ridiculous.
Jaywalking in Spain? They must be broke.
They are!
You must be a most interesting FB friend…lol.
I keep moving lol
not really jaywalking but crossing when the pedestrian light was not green “yet” (it turned green 5 seconds after we started crossing). I could make a legal claim about it but the tax for complaining equals the fine. Big business.
They do that in Washington, DC too……..or used to……..anything for a buck!
Pam
They screw us and don’t even give us a kiss once they are done
Haha! I NEED to light my keyboard on fire and tell my boss that I’m the mother of his kids now!
To add drama you better tell his wife you are the father of her kids, always to the wife.
100 bucks for jaywalking? Jaywalking is usual here … think I should enter the “gendarmerie” immediately ….”I’m the mother of her kids”….what would “Jose Julian” do after this statement?
Probably die or slap you silly lol
Sounds just like Italy.
The key in here is the surprise element.
Funny, I’m about to do the same thing at my job.
And it actually is one of the things I’ll walk out for.
Poor Vicky… her boob job has been thwarted another day.
The sad part is Vicky is a HE lol Life isn’t fair
Who said guys don’t want boobs too?
Vicky will have to give his dream up.
My boss yelled at me today but I can’t take your advice. That is pretty much my daily behavior: I show up late, I have breakfast while facebooking, I wear inappropriate outfits, I leave early ….hmmmm…The more I write, the more I realize I should forgive him he yelled at me….But poor VIcky…
I’m going to seek your wise counsel from now on, Leo. In fact, I’m going to have WWLD bumper stickers and t-shirts made up. Also, why do you suppose that Spanish-speaking people are the only ones who name their kids Jesus? You don’t see guys named Jesus in France or Italy or ireland or anything, and they’re probably just as Catholic. I find that interesting.
Well Madam, I’d be flattered to see those stickers plastering the biggest cities in the world. Teens wearing the WWLD bracelets, tshirts, banners in all major roads, I’ll dream for awhile.
Ok, enough dreaming, you planted the curiosity bug about the Jesus name, I did some extensive (wikipedia) research and this is all I found: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus#Etymology_of_names
I need to know more, I may use your question for a post if you don’t mind.
I think that would make an interesting post, Leo. I think I’ve wondered that myself.
I need to look into it or just make up some facts lol
Go ahead, please do!
Querido amigo, ¡creo que escribes mejor en español que en inglés! ¡Jajajajaja! xoxoM
Ya me gustaria, eso tiene mas edicion que mis posts, ya yo no se lo que hablo. En el trabajo estoy prohibido de escribir emails en espanol, digo cosas que no existen. La vida es cruel y se rie de mi en todos los idiomas hahahaha
Por suerte, ¡las carcajadas se entienden en cualquier idioma! xoM
Eso es verdad. Lo mejor es reirse de uno mismo.
I got to read the start to dating advice and then it wasn’t there.
My bad, I hit publish by accident, now is up.
Man, from what I’m hearing of the Spanish economy, I think I’d set my BS filter to maximum, grit my teeth, and just handle it. (I’ve never done that in MY life, regardless how badly I needed the job, so take what I suggest with a LOT of salt!
)
Lighting your keyboard on fire should get the boss’s attention, right? Sounds like your friend needs to stick up for himself. He needs some huevos.
It should would. My friend should save money for a huevos implant lol