Kiss of Death
Knock knock
Whose there?
Death.
Is that you Death?
And as I laid in bed death approached me. Her breath was fetid so I offered her Scope and Mentos. If she was going to kiss me at least I wanted it to be dignified. She rinsed her mouth and when she was ready to swallow the last bit of Mentos her cellphone rang.
She had another appointmnet to take of, she promised she would return, and I know she will, probably tonight.
But tonight I’m ready, tonight I’m wearing my dying underwear and combed my hair.
Not sexy but will keep the post mortem pee and other in place.
Readers and Readeresses, last night I thought it was my last. I’ve never recovered fully from the Flu from Hell. I put my guard down and it attacked again, it outnumbered my army, it’s asking for my head. I keep battling, but last night was horrible, a fever of 102F (39C). I was shaking all night like a blender. Then a fit of sweating sent to torment me by Satan took over my body. It was not normal, it was more than what a man is supposed to endure, yet I endured it. After the sweating came the cold, my body was going from solid, to liquid to plasma, I didn’t know what I was, I wanted to die.
Calling Death…
I called Death, she hung up on me twice.
I skipped the day at work so I could call those who loved me and say my goodbyes, for today I’m sure is my last day. I can’t nor want to endure another night like I did.
To you fellow bloggers and bloggeresses, I say goodbye just in case I go on a joyride with Death.
Sincerely hallucinating,
Me
-This is an scheduled post, I may or may not stil be alive-
Eek! Well, I genuinely hope you survived! *hugs* Feel better soon!
I won this battle Rara. Thanks!
oh no.. Leo! take care of yourself… although I like the writing as you approach death– hallucinating and all.
I have a few more creations thanks to my hallucinations.
Switch the phone off. We hope you don’t die Leo as those are not pants of style.
But those undies keep mess on its place
Leo, please, don’t orphan poor Doggy!!!
I’m still alive, it’ll take more than a flu (or 1 more day with the same flu) to take me down
Nope – sorry Leo – you can’t get out of living the rest of your exciting life this way….we won’t let you….a bad cold? The flu? Oh no…..too easy….it needs to be a much more INTERESTING exit for you. Besides, those death panties really are NOT flattering….didn’t they have them in a bright color???? Seriously though – GET WELL – you don’t have time to be sick and Doggy needs you!
Pam
I’m back Pam.
Still laughing about “this is a scheduled post…”! I hope you’re still alive!
Leo, hang in there! Cocco and I would miss your crazy posts too much!
You’re young and strong. You won’t die. But it would be a good idea to visit a doctor nevertheless. Other people take drugs to hallucinate you get it for free. Means the flu can’t be sent by the pope, must have been Oprah.
I am quite sure you are not going to die from the Flu Leo. Nonetheless, I wish you a speedy recovery and trust that death hangs up on you many, many more times. I’m sure that’s better than being put on endless hold
Leo I hope you are still with us! That flu bug has a vicious bite this year. I know, I had it in December thanks to my two year old Great-Nephew. I lived on grape flavored Pedialyte and chicken and noodles, went thru 4011 kleenex boxes. Stay hydrated with your fever even it it makes the snot roll!
The death is a SHE?… hmmm …somehow I guessed it… Please get well soon and kick the Flu-Gremlin in the butt.
Wow…so close…a narrow escape. a nasty Kiss. Feel better soon!
Do we have to wait until tomorrow to find out? Or are you very organised and have you scheduled the posts for the whole week? You could be dead or alive and we won’t know! Wow you are shrodingers (no idea how to spell that) cat! (Yes typist watches too much big bang theory!)
Haha, shrodingers cat!
Your dying underwear is pure brilliance! Good thinking.
Get well soon, Leo!
Wow….hope you outlived the scheduled posting of this….um, post.
I wouldn’t worry. These days, she doesn’t call-she texts.
Oh, Leo, I hope you haven’t died. I’d hate to think of your corpse languishing in such unstylish underwear. And if you are still alive, I hope you’re feeling better very soon. There’s nothing worse than going through all the stages of matter. The liquid goo phase is the worst.
I’m getting back to normal, body still weak but spirit strong lol
Feel better soon, Leo!
Doggy and we, need you.
“What was your last memory of Doggy?”
“Uhhh, lumpy underwear?”
If you’re blogging from The Other Side, you might want to update your banner to Doggy’s Style by Ghost Leo. If you’ve slipped out of the Grim Reaper’s grasp, take it easy this time! My assistant had the flu and then he relapsed.
I’m still with the living, this time was nasty. I thought I was a goner.
Glad you made it out of your sick bed alive.
Leo …. 39 in fever – nothing …. and I’m sure that death hasn’t even looked your way .. *smile
Satan … he want touch you. So you have just flue like 1000 and 1000 have just now and you have to suffer through it – take it easy and enjoy the bed .. take a massive whisky after a very hot show and you will sleep like a baby while you sweat everything out. Also if you have fever should you be in a chilled room – promise you … that works. I’m an experts on colds hand flue – had 10-15 per year until I start take Cod Liver Oil. Now I have maybe 1 per year.
This is terrible! Shouldn’t Doggy be scaring death away for you??
Be well
Hope I’m not too late!
Goodness! I sure as hell hope you are alive!! Please feel better and FAST.
I popped in to see if you’d survived, but I can’t tell. I hope you left some food out for Doggy!
Yeah, but since you lived, next time you can just be annoyed when the flu rolls around.
Leo I truly hope your feeling better if not go to the DOCTOR PLEASE! What would we do with you & Ms. H. Peach?
Thanks Nancy!
P. S. typo error I meant without you & Miss H. Peach
My email showed more posts from you (cause I’m behind) so hopefully, that means death got tired of your phone calls and blocked you.
I’m alive!!
Leo you make me laugh
hope you are getting better
Poor you. Every time I get sick I get the 39 even 40. I never have like 38. With 38 I would probably go to work. I feel with you, fever that high even beats menstrual pain, lol.
Love your blog….stay well!