The Day I Lost My Marbles (aka balls)

Not too long ago I told you about the experience of a very good friend of mine with hair removal techniques. 
The story was narrated in the first person of the singular just to add a bit of drama, but it wasn’t me and this that I’m about to tell you didn’t happen to me either.
So brace yourself for impact, or not, this is how the story was told to me:

“I’ve been so busy with work, working 11+ hours a day, 6/days a week. Had barely have time to walk with my beast, let alone keep up with my grooming habits.
My looks are the same than Tom Hanks after a month in Cast Away, hobo beard and messy sideburns.

Remove the uniform and give him a ratty coat and you have a hobo.

Remove the uniform and give him a ratty coat and you have a hobo.

I usually get a waxing appointment once a month, but it hasn’t happened in about 2. I decided it was time to remove the body hair, I needed to put some Kinesio Tape because my old injuries were bothering me, and we all know that tape over hair is a big NO NO.

That's Kinesio Tape, removing it with hair it's just too painful.

That’s Kinesio Tape, removing it with hair it’s just too painful.

Anyway, I bought this hair removal cream, Nair, went over the instructions and applied a bit just to see if I was allergic or my skin too sensitive, after 8 minutes it was fine, it removed the bit of hair from the are I tested it.

Looks like severe mange, but once it's been clean looks nicer.

Looks like severe mange, but once it’s been clean looks nicer.

Then I applied it all over and by all over I do mean ALL OVER. Once I was done applying it, I washed my hands and waited, put some music on and let the time passed.
I lost track of time, 12 minutes later I got in the shower and started removing the cream, legs as smooth as baby butts, I was happy.

Smoother than a baby zombie

Smoother than a baby zombie

When it was time to remove the bit from the nutsack disaster!!
I though my scrotum was going to fall off and the balls were going to drop and go down the drain.
It burnt!!

The Gospel of Truth

The Gospel of Truth

The itchiness!!
The pain!!!
Was so red!!!
Ohhh Lord!!!!
Aloe vera only made it worse, cold water was fine, ice was better. But I couldn’t possible sit on ice all day long.
I thought the pain would never go away, but it finally did, it wasn’t pain, it was closer to feeling a constant burning, like having your crotch in fire (gingers are sexy).

Hilarious pic, you gotta laugh!

Hilarious pic, you gotta laugh!

Now that my balls are back to normal, I’m not the only one enjoying the smoothness, just saying.” 

I feel sorry for my friend. Have your balls/ladyballs ever caught fire?
You think gingers are sexy? (not all of course, you gotta see carrot top, he’s scary)

Not a ginger you'd like to bang

Not a ginger you’d like to bang

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